30 Unique Gifts For Paddlers
With the gift-giving season upon us, we’re always looking for paddling-related gifts for our fellow canoe and kayak friends who already have all the usual paddling gear. While doing some Black Friday shopping, we fell into a rabbit-hole of riches that we thought we should share in our first-ever (and semi-tongue-in-cheek) gift guide.
So warm up the plastic and get Primed, (see what we did there?) and let’s take a look at some of the more unusual (and sometimes head-scratching things) we discovered on Amazon. Who knows? Maybe you’ll find something perfect for that special paddler in your life.
This groovy little wagon is not only made of solid beechwood, but it also looks like it’s heading to the beach. What it does or what the purpose of it is besides looking cool is beyond us. But seriously, who doesn’t miss wood-paneled doors?
Question: What’s better than an incense burner? Answer: An incense burner that can burn twice the Nag Champa. That’s right, this wooden darling will do double-duty calming your nerves and restoring your offseason zen.
Stir sticks shaped like paddles are like little baby angel wings for your cocktail.
Man’s best friend will not be forgotten on this list. No, Fido will adore and be adored in this plaid-meets-paddler canoe pattern. Feel like completing the ensemble? There’s also a matching leash.
Sorry ladies, only men can play with these bones – you’re going to have to find your own set of dominoes! Seriously, why are these described as “Men’s”? We really have no idea. Either it’s an honest mistake or these are easily the most sexist set of dominoes to exist.
A multi-tool that’s a jack-of-all-trades but will most likely be the master of one beer at a time.
Holy cats, there’s a bed that’s shaped like a canoe for a feline?! What’ll they think of next?
Here’s a real gem. Check out this shlub of a husband making his wife do all the work. We don’t know what makes us laugh more, the illustration or the questionable size and position of it hanging in the living room example on Amazon.
You’ll feel like a kid again when you’re popping the head back on this LEGO kayaker after he hits some serious Class IV carpet waves. Or you’ll feel like a middle-aged paddler creating LEGO-kayak videos like this.
From one classic toy figure to another, check out this famous blonde and the only kayak ever built with wheels. Just look how much fun can be had with this setup before the tide takes her out to sea.
Nothing says digital-but-outdoorsy like a wooden USB drive. This will pair well with your Maple-finished MacBook Pro.
The next best thing to a Milespaddled.com sticker on your vehicle might be this mystical, albeit confusing, decal of two unicorns paddling a canoe.
Luckily for the ladies, this poker set is gender-neutral.
Why is that bear in a canoe? Did he steal it? Did he eat the owner? Is he smarter than the average bear? All these questions are sure to be asked when wearing this shirt.
Scarier than a bear is a kayak with shark teeth. Contrary to popular belief, it’s a proven fact that other kayakers will paddle faster not when they hear banjo music, but when they see this coming from upstream.
We’re honestly not sure what the purpose of this thing is but it sure is small, it looks delicate and can apparently sit on a plate.
If this bottle opener fails in opening a bottle the traditional way, it certainly looks heavy-duty enough to just bash the bottle open.
I have one of these. It’s small but it looks like my kayak – talk about an emotional connection.
Hmm – never heard of an herb and spice grinder before. I wonder what on earth one actually grinds in this hippie contraption…
For the very-specific Corgi-loving paddling crowd, we found some fabric that brings to life the reality that Corgis’ are really great kayakers. Nevermind the fact that this fabric sells at $27 a yard, it’s as rare and special as a dog that kayaks.
As a fan of cribbage, I can’t find one single fault with this idea.
The Cozy Canoe is the perfect way to kick-back indoors but feel like your outdoors while simultaneously texting and Snapchatting your squad.
We question this inflatable “canoe” considering only an infant could fit in it and it looks terribly unstable. Therefore, we do not recommend putting an infant in it and instead, maybe just enjoy watching it float around the pool.
Tubby-time has never looked more rustic and modern with this shower curtain (modern bathroom not included but recommended).
We reached out to the CreekKooler folks for a sponsorship. We’re still awaiting a response.
It’s a chocolate canoe, folks. Sure it’s $12 and we have no idea if it’s any good, but it’s in the shape of a canoe!
A fox, a racoon and an owl get into a canoe together – this joke never gets old! The tiniest of future Miles Paddlers will love to snuggle this gut-busting trio.
Nevermind that it’s $70, we can’t think of a more mind-numbing exercise than putting together a 1000-piece puzzle that’s 70% solid-white pieces.
We’ve really struggled with where to start with this one. Do we point out that these cufflinks say “canoeing” but show a drawing of kayaks? Or do we point out that the font is kinda like Comic Sans but also kind of looks like a knock-off? Or do we just point out that the cufflink market for the paddling enthusiast has to be incredibly niche?
So this exists. And it’s made with pear wood as if that should matter.